Life is a risk! Don't fear the smut. Learn to filter it out and clean it up.

In a past life, before the traveling, before the blogging, before dabbling in vegetarian cooking and WWOOFing, I was a customer service rep for our own ISP/hosting company.  I’m not a techie person, but I could tell someone how to set up a dial-up connection.  We got the wackiest customers sometimes, from people who could barely speak English to grandmas going online to e-mail their grandbabies, to a trans-sexual lesbian who thought I sounded “cute” and wanted me to come to California to meet her.  Um, yeah.  Anyway.  I’ve heard some crazy things.  But the craziest one was the “no smut on my computer woman”.

She called and signed up for Internet access.

ME: Sure, great, here’s your information.  Do you need help setting this up?

HER: Yes.

ME: Sure, fine. Turn on your computer, and click on the Start menu.

HER: Well, it’s in the box.

ME: Sorry?  What box?  The Start button is in the bottom left-hand corner of your screen.

HER: No, I mean… my computer.  It’s still in the box.  I just bought it.

ME: Oh (I’m rolling my eyes).  Well, you’ll have to set it up and install it first.  I can’t help you with that, just the Internet connection.

HER: But I don’t want to set up  my computer!

ME: (oh geez, lady!) Um, you can’t use it at all if you don’t set it up…why wouldn’t you want to set it up!?

HER: Oh, I don’t want to get any smut on my computer.

ME: (long silence)  Ok, well.  You can’t use your computer unless you set it up.  And you just signed up for Internet access.  I mean, it’s just a waste of money if you can’t even use your computer.

HER: But if I plug my computer in, and turn on the power, I know I’ll just get smut in my e-mail.  It happened to a friend of mine.

ME: (!!!!!) Well, I understand what you’re talking about, but that’s not going to happen if you just plug in your computer.  You have to be connected to the Internet to receive any e-mails or other information.  You don’t have to sign up for Internet access to use your computer…

After about 30 minutes of explaining the ins and outs of spam filters, Internet access, computer in general, anti-virus, and how to tell a friend’s e-mail from hackers and p0rnbots, I finally convinced the woman to set up her computer, and keep her new Internet account.  But it took a lot of effort to convince her that you don’t magically receive “smut” through the electric plug (this was in the days before wireless Internet).

Wow!  So what is there to learn from this? We have to take some risks in life.  Heck, LIVING is a risk.  Every bite of food you eat, every step you take, every ray of sunlight that hits your face…it all eventually leads to your death.  Scary thought, eh?  Most of us don’t even think of those things, the real risks.  We’re more concerned about the little unimportant risks that seem so big: if I speak my mind, will people still like me?  If I wear this dress, or wear my hair this way, will he love it, or be turned off?  What if I submit my novel and I get rejected?  It feels safer to keep your opinions and creativity “in the box”.  If you plug in to the world, you may get rejected!  People may criticize you or make fun of you.  You may (gasp) fail!

A life without risks is like an Internet connection without a computer.  Meaningless.  I know it’s hard to put yourself out on stage for the world to throw rotten tomatoes at.   But without being yourself and standing up for what you think, you’re just a sheep, baaing along with all the other identical sheep.  Uninteresting, dumb, and seemingly mindless.  No one wants to listen to you (except the occasional wolf, who thinks you’ll be easily taken in).

If I had been afraid to take risks, I would never have seen the places I have.  I would be sitting in Arkansas, too afraid that we would all “die of malaria” in Belize.  I would not have taken the commission-based sales jobs I had that taught me so much about people and life (and a little bit about selling). I would never have started a blog or put up my picture or tried escargot or blood sausage or green smoothies. Would I be technically alive?  Yes, but I don’t know if I would call that life “living”.

There is “smut”  in our life.  It is unavoidable. But we can’t let our fear of the bad things consume us.   You have options: filter, fight back, delete.  Get rid of whatever is holding you back, and start to really live!

What is holding you back in your life?  What risks are you afraid to take?   What are you afraid of?

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photo credit: seemann on morguefile.com